Dear Lonely,
In my previous post, I talked mostly about all the emotions I struggle with when I'm feeling lonely. I wanted to focus on the emotions because I want to be completely honest about my struggle. Now, I want to offer some encouragement and truth to those that are also struggling with loneliness and those same emotions. Loneliness is still one of my biggest struggles and although I have grown in this area a lot throughout the years, I know I'm still a work in progress. But, I want to offer two major things I have learned:
1) Nothing, aside from the Lord, truly makes loneliness better. There are things that may seem to make it better or more bearable, but in the end they never satisfy. Even good things can't fulfill our deepest desires and needs. For example, friends are great and important to have as a support system but they can't become our only support. God should be first. Our interests and hobbies can also be great distractions but again they can't give us everything we need.
Then of course there's sin. I know sin seems so much more appealing when you're lonely. I know it's tempting to turn to things like alcohol or drugs to numb the pain. Or to just sleep around or to turn to pornography or whatever else to make the loneliness disappear. If you're deep in any sin right now, I want to say something to you. I am not condemning or judging anyone here-that is not my intention. But you are in bondage. (I'm talking to myself too here) I know doing whatever we want and sinning seems like we're free, but we're really not. We're in bondage to our flesh and our desires and we always end up feeling more empty in the end. God loves you and does not want to see you in bondage. He is not there to condemn you or make you feel guilty. He just wants to set you free from your sin. But you have to turn to Him.
2) You are not alone. I know it may feel like no one-including God- is around, but He always is. God sometimes withdraws the sense of His presence in our lives to help us grow in our faith. But it doesn't mean He has completely left us. He promised in the Bible to never leave or forsake us. And God can't lie. So you can rest in this: you are never alone. God reminded me of this earlier this year. It was right before my birthday and I was just feeling incredibly lonely and sad that I didn't have anyone special to spend it with. I was in my room and I had Pandora playing on my phone. I started praying and then started crying because I was just so upset about still being single and getting older. Then this song came on: "By Your Side" by Tenth Avenue North. It's a Christian song and Christian songs rarely come up on my Pandora station because I just normally don't have it set to any. But it came on and I didn't pay attention at first to it because I was crying. But then suddenly I heard the lyrics: "Why are you crying?" And I just stopped and listened. The lyrics were exactly what I needed to hear. I know that God used them to speak to me and to let me know He was still there. By the end of the song, I was crying and laughing at the same time because I knew that He had used it to get my attention. It still makes me cry sometimes when I hear it. Go here to listen to it. I hope it encourages you and brings you comfort.
Psalm 9:10 NIV "Those who know your name will trust in you, for you Lord have never forsaken those who seek you."
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