Dear Dealing With Disappointment,
I've realized that most of the time when I write these posts, it's because I'm dealing with the same topic. And right now I'm dealing with disappointment. Today I was very disappointed by something that happened. I had my heart and hopes set on something that seemed so perfect and lined up with exactly what I have been praying for. But it fell through and I didn't get it. The whole time I was praying for this thing I wanted, I kept praying for God to close the door on it if it wasn't what He wanted. Apparently, it isn't what He wanted for me because the door is closed. And I'm upset and a little bitter about it. I wish I wasn't. I tried to prepare myself for things falling through and tried to let it go and have peace about it. But I didn't get what I really wanted and now I feel like a child throwing a tantrum because I didn't get what I want.
I think this disappointment is especially difficult for me to deal with right now because there are other areas in my life I have recently been disappointed about. Sometimes I feel like God dangles something in front of me, making me want it and chase after it, only to rip it away soon after. I've talked to other Christians who have felt the same way. It's easy for us to begin to think of God as this detached, cruel dictator who does things or keeps us away from things just because He can or feels like it. It's difficult to remember the truth. The truth that God loves us and He wants to bless us with good things and the desires of our heart. But He knows and understands things we don't. He has plans for us and He knows our future. And this affects the things He allows or brings into our lives.
The thing I try to think of when I'm feeling like this and don't understand why God has done something is how children are taken care of by their parents. Adults and parents understand and know things that kids don't. When they discipline their children or don't allow their kids to do something, it's because it's the best for them. They are protecting and teaching them through this. They are showing their love. This is what God does. It doesn't always feel like it's out of love, but it is. Maybe God has something better for us when we are disappointed. Or maybe it just isn't the right timing. We may never know. But tomorrow is a new day and we always have hope.
Romans 5:5 NIV "And hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."
